“I am tired. I want to sleep!! I want to sleep for a long time in a warm and cozy bed, then when I wake up I want to sleep some more.”
Sounds like a two-year old whining doesn’t it? Well it isn’t a toddler complaining to his/her Mommy, it’s the voice inside my head whining to me when I am tired, worn out and simply want to collapse in exhaustion. Though it’s not something I mention often or talk about at all really, I have a condition called hypothyroidism that for lack of a better description makes me feel tired. A lot.
What is hypothyroidism? It’s a condition caused by an under-active thyroid gland. What does your thyroid gland do? It produces hormones that help control all sorts of important stuff like how your body uses energy, regulates temperature and other things that you don’t think about your body doing. Since my thyroid is under-active, I do not have enough hormones running through my body to keep things working as they should, which results in lower energy, feeling cold then feeling really hot, having trouble losing weight, hair falling out, etc, etc. Sounds fantastic doesn’t it?!
All kidding aside, while having hypothyroidism is not a serious life threatening matter, it is frustrating to deal with. I take a pill every day that contains supplementary TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) that is supposed to boost my thyroid function but even with that supposed boost, I often feel sluggish. This results in me being irritated because I am a type A personality – often doing several things at once – and thus need to feel sharp. With a demanding life (work, social life, family and now school), there is nothing more annoying to me these days then feeling foggy and being unable to concentrate. It really sucks and I want nothing more than for that feeling to go away.
I am generally a positive person and given that there is no “cure” for hypothyroidism, for the most part I have learned to live with it and found ways to stay healthy. Since a lot of the effects of this condition stem from low energy, I have to commit myself every day to eating a good diet, sleeping the right amount and exercising to stay fit. Lately, I have been really slacking on all 3 parts. Ok, ok it’s only been about 5 days of this but it has thrown me for a loop. Today I feel like I will never get out of this funk that I’m in and feel like myself again. That is probably the fatigue talking, but it’s truly how I feel.
With that in mind: I am going to give myself some time wallow in this for a bit (just a bit!) longer. I believe I will get out of this funk and I will go back to those good habits of taking care of myself which will make me feel infinitely better. But for now, I’m going to keep on my yoga pants, let my dark under-eye circles show and if I need to, cry a little.
Unless she’s a robot, no lady can be perfect all the time, including me. I am taking this weak moment in stride and have promised myself that I will use it to help me get back on track again. In a world where we are always on the go and something always needs our attention, its ok give yourself a break once in a while!